Here is a great way to look at and design for empathy

image: Indi Young

This excellent resource on empathy comes from Indi Young. Her equation for empathy is as follows:

"there’s an equation to how I use two kinds of empathy in my work.

I use empathic listening to develop cognitive empathy.

I use it over time. Time is an important part of the equation.

Cognitive empathy doesn’t instantly appear.

I use listening sessions to develop cognitive empathy with research participants.

I use listening sessions with stakeholders over months to develop direction and trust.

I use listening sessions over years with my co-workers to build enduring collaborative relationships."

For empathetic listening Indi suggests you:

a) Recognize that a person has something going on

b) Remind yourself that this something is their valid truth

c) Communicate your recognition of their something. Offer to listen.

d) Stay out of judgment as you listen. Make them feel heard.

Once you have done this, you can move on to cognitive empathy:

The person’s inner voice, thinking, emotional reactions, and guiding principles. Cognitive empathy is really what you want to get to after you empathetically listen.

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